you all boggle the mind.

so you believe there is no supreme being that created all this? you think this all happened by accident. ok.. ok, so where did this all come from? no answer? why believe that something like this happened by accident from nothing? hmm, seems like a little more sense that something above us, beyond our level of conscious understanding, was here before it all and created it.

but wait, even if i'm wrong in my beliefs, i really have nothing to fear. if there isn't anything after this, oh well, no more consciousness. big deal, that's what you think will happen anyway. let's see what you think now.. if you are wrong, you have a lot to fear because there isn't any going back on what you say. if you are wrong and there is something after this, you are screwed. that has been written already.

just seems more logical to me to actually just believe in something that might actually save you, incase what you have been thinking will end up being your demise. oh well. don't expect any sympathy because you don't deserve it.

ain't to hard to get a free ipod http://www.freeiPods.com/?r=12071502

you all boggle the mind.

it's funny, you think this all happened by chance. that this huge universe just always occupied everything. well where did it come from? your belief can't even answer where it came from yet you would rather believe that, than to think there just might be a supreme being, beyond any level of consciousness we can comprehend, that created it all. it just shows you can't think outside of your own little insignificant shell. you think you are book smart? well big deal, you can't see past your nose.

if i'm wrong in my belief, then nothing really bad is going to happen anyway; i'll be unconscious under the ground forever, no big deal. if you are wrong, you are in for a world of pain. why would you want to believe in that? seems more logical to believe in something that just may save your life, no matter how high the odds you may think. it still makes more logical sense than your beliefs that, "this all came by chance from nothing." don't look for any sympathy if you happen to be wrong because you won't get any. open your eyes.

i take that back, the new version has a nicer livejournal interface. oooo eeeee :) zippy dippy dee.

using the new 4.9.10 version of centericq. it's like looking into version 4.9.8's mirror. you all should get it... http://www.centericq.de

morals:
a) Something most of my friends and acquaintances don't have.
b) Something 95% of the people in California/New York/Florida don't have.

ex 1. Yeah I think it's alright if someone wants to kill a person as long as the person is in their body, because then that person is the "property" of the someone. And if something is your property, you can destroy it without regret.(Too bad no one claimed you as their property and did the same to you, maybe you'd reconsider.)

ex 2. Yeah I think it's wrong to help someone that is being tortured because that person has no rights in this country, so screw them. Who cares the torturer was told to stop, I mean... look at WWII, we had no right helping those tortured souls.(I hope someday you get to live through hell, just to realize how wrong in your beliefs you are, in who deserves help.)

ex 3. Yeah I have no problem in believing evil is cool, and thinking people are cool for talking and being evil, but when someone tries to tell me Jesus died for me, I know that someone must be lying to me because there is no proof that that man existed at all. And believing in something, that brings me no instant gratification, is purely illogical and deserves ridicule. It's just not cool to be not evil.(I hope you grow old alone, and realize how wrong you are.)

doesn't take much to be a "real" friend. it really doesn't.

derp, i forgot, there won't be anything to retire on, at from the govt anyway. long live the united states of currency.

yay 80 hours on me paycheck. is it almost time to retire yet?

is there any love left?

need to vent? tired of idiots dictating how you should act towards their stupidity? voice your hate: www.hotwaxresidues.com/moronalog

if you are a current internet user, the N.I.C has provided you with a statement that may help clear up any problems you have with your computer... www.rapidnet.com/~awally/NIC.htm.

using centericq to post to the journal is so convenient. i recomment it to all of you http://centericq.de/

hello

here is a little aim conversation i thought you'd find amusing:

JDjfireboy: mattttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt
JDjfireboy: punk
NO vaca NER: sup bitch
JDjfireboy: u
NO vaca NER: um working
JDjfireboy: your workng that sucks
NO vaca NER: yeah but at least you wou will get your drugs todayill have your drugs today
NO vaca NER: so that's good
JDjfireboy: yup
JDjfireboy: i had a 16 year old boy hit on me last night
JDjfireboy: heheheheheh
JDjfireboy: he thought i was 19
JDjfireboy: thats funnnnn
JDjfireboy: ie
NO vaca NER: jail bait
NO vaca NER: i woulda told on ya
NO vaca NER: :-)
JDjfireboy: thats why he stayed at the party if he was 18 he would of came home with mme
JDjfireboy: and had some fun
JDjfireboy: ;-)
JDjfireboy: you want to take a str8 test
JDjfireboy: see how str8 you are
JDjfireboy: http://www.straightacting.com/
NO vaca NER: no thanks dipshit
NO vaca NER: i already know i'm not gay
JDjfireboy: come on take it
JDjfireboy: take it and see what you score
NO vaca NER: why do you have to overemphasize the fact you are gay with everything you say to me?
JDjfireboy: for fun
NO vaca NER: i don't overemphasize the fact i'm straight to you
NO vaca NER: and ask you to take gay tests
JDjfireboy: what
JDjfireboy: sorry
NO vaca NER: goddamn it's annoying
JDjfireboy: i didnt think i did that
NO vaca NER: ask everything you guys do to nick is annoying
NO vaca NER: acting like he's gay and wants touching
JDjfireboy: what do i do to nick
JDjfireboy: i dont touch nick
NO vaca NER: you act like he's gay and need to touch
NO vaca NER: and make comments
NO vaca NER: as does brandon
NO vaca NER: and everyone else in your house except adam
JDjfireboy: i never touch nick and i dont make any comment about him
NO vaca NER: that weird paul guy does it too
NO vaca NER: you arre all lame
JDjfireboy: paul is just like that
NO vaca NER: doesn't make it alright that paul does it
NO vaca NER: yet you don't tell him not to
JDjfireboy: tell me this when is the last time i touch nick and said something about him being gay
NO vaca NER: the time you asked to sleep in his bed like 3 times when you were rollin
JDjfireboy: well paul does it to everone,, even mark he does it
NO vaca NER: well ya know what, i'd kick paul in the face if he did that to me and i told him to stop and he did it again
JDjfireboy: thats was along time ago
JDjfireboy: i i said i was sorry the next day,, pl;us i was fuck up on drugs,,,
JDjfireboy: thats between you and paul
NO vaca NER: eh you push your gay views on everyone
JDjfireboy: sleep and having sex is two different things
NO vaca NER: i don't come over and make little remarks about being straight and try to get you to change
NO vaca NER: no, guys don't sleep together when they have their own bed in the house
JDjfireboy: well i guess we dont have to worry about that do we
NO vaca NER: putting naked guys as your desktop
JDjfireboy: its my cpu
JDjfireboy: can do anythign i want
JDjfireboy: you dont have girls on your
JDjfireboy: have you ever
NO vaca NER: i don't
NO vaca NER: and i wouldn't put a naked one on it to offend you on purpose
NO vaca NER: fuckin inconsiderate fuck
JDjfireboy: whats
NO vaca NER: we civil people don't do it because it might be offensive to some, but you the moron, don't care, and think it's funny
JDjfireboy: i dont care if i see a naked girl
JDjfireboy: if you think that
NO vaca NER: yeah well you don't see it on our computers because we're not rude bastards
JDjfireboy: i dont no i never seen your cpu
JDjfireboy: so how would i no
NO vaca NER: because it's pitch black
JDjfireboy: sure
JDjfireboy: what ever
NO vaca NER: yeah whatever jeff
JDjfireboy: your funny
NO vaca NER: your dumb
JDjfireboy: yup
JDjfireboy: thats me
NO vaca NER: we all know it
JDjfireboy: so you going to take the test
NO vaca NER: no
NO vaca NER: i'm straight
NO vaca NER: i already know it
JDjfireboy: ever one nows that
NO vaca NER: yeah so why should i take it
JDjfireboy: for fun
NO vaca NER: should i have you take a test to see how gay you are
JDjfireboy: thast all
JDjfireboy: if you want
NO vaca NER: unlike you, i'm not obsessed with people';s sexual preferences
NO vaca NER: i don't need to bring up the fact i'm straight every minute like you need to let everyone know you are gay
NO vaca NER: it's funny how you have to reiterate it many times a day
NO vaca NER: makes me wonder
JDjfireboy: i dont think i bring up that im gay,, i just ran acroos this site and i thought it was funn
JDjfireboy: y
NO vaca NER: no
NO vaca NER: you emphasize that you are gay everyday
NO vaca NER: it's funny

www.playmash.com i love my jesse
You will live in House.
You will drive a black mustang.
You will marry jesse and have 4 kids.
You will be a hamburger flipper in peru.

i really hate working at 8am. i feel like such a child getting pissed off and almost making myself late for 10 more minutes of sleep. well i figured out one of my biggest faults that gets me into trouble is being addicted to affection. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. such drama. oh yeah, it's been 5 months or so since i've written, damnnn. you can thank that to a lesser depression on my part. you seem to lose ambition to tell others what you are feeling when you aren't constantly thinking about it. i love the pink. but i'll be back.

Date:	2002-10-14 23:52
Subject:	on your marks
Security:	Public
Mood:	sore

well it's almost been a month on it and i love this prescription heh. i've also been joggin a couple miles every other day, sometimes with jesse, who could kick anyone's ass i know at running hahah. it's great runnin with someone else, it just makes ya want to work that much harder. all this sparked by no ambition to do anything. well that ambition really hasn't returned, but i have gotten to the root of it by my own overanalyzing. it's all because of school. i don't want to go anymore. it's not fun anymore, and all i do is put off my homework. i put it off but in that time i don't do what i want, but i do just overreact that it's not getting done and then all i do is worry about it. pointless ey? yes i know. putting off homework and then worrying to death about it. only i could possibly screw up my own mentality by doing this shit. but anyways i'm going to resolve to do homework one hour every day now. hopefully that will catch me up and get me back in to my school groove, if you'd call it that anyway. plus i know i'll get back into being social with everyone that thinks i've become a hermit. it's quite a relief actually realizing why i don't want to really hang out or do anything with anyone though. anyways, time for bed. love ya.

p.s. find this song, it's damn good. damn damn good. speedy j - reenter.

i wish i was a girl so i could get a free ride through life.

well i like paxil. after a week i can feel it working and i can even feel it lose it's potency today as the dose is about to end. but tomorrow i double the dose so that's cool. so what are you all doing tonight? making hell for other's i assume? "you" would do so much for me if i asked, i know.

isn't it funny what we let not be known to everyone around us for fear what we feel will be rejected or somehow ridiculed? as if in some way you are inferior to them. or is it just unsupported paranoia?

when did it become wrong to say what you really thought? 1st grade? and when did being my friend become so popular? and what would i do without you? would i be too proud? should i worry about offending someone by being myself? should i really care if you think this is stupid? would you waste your time to tell me so? would anyone recognize themself in type?

you != you;

here you might enjoy.. you prolly already saw em all though jesse hehehe. oh well.
http://209.61.189.175/perl-bin/base/search.cgi?type=&fuz=beg&keywords=novacane&from_poem=na&name=&sort_by=name i can't believe i spelled anxiety wrong in surreal nights.

i wonder what a year will bring. usually i can imagine what stuff will be like in a few years, even if it's totally off and i forgot what i imagined, which is irrelevant, but it all stopped on this year now. it's kinda weird.

Date:	2002-09-10 23:40
Subject:	elbow deep inside the borderline
Security:	Public
Mood:	exanimate

i couldn't have said it better myself, even if i was a monkey.

first things off.. i hate you.

me: well today sucked, which is getting to be pretty normal every time that tomorrow finally makes it today. i hate charles dickens. i hate david copperfield. old english writing isn't good in any way. oh yeah the story is kind of entertaining, but i feel that it is only because i have made myself believe that, in order to keep myself from falling asleep while reading it. why do morons think it's good writing just because he uses stupid words that no one knows and arranges his sentences as paragraphs and makes you forget what you were reading. and if you managed to remember what you are reading, he manages to lose me by saying everything backwards from my normal sentence structure. if you don't understand this or think i'm wrong, go read another book by him. this book is only serving the purpose to piss me off about how they treated children in england back in the 1800s. i mean during class discussion that's all you can really talk about; is how bleak it is.
you: interesting.
me: indeed.

complaining_time = over;